The Haunting of Morella

“Breasts. That is kinda what this movie was about. It was tailor made for a latch-key kid in the 90s to stay up late watching HBO to eventually see breasts. Breasts. It delivered that. There was some plot about an evil witch and breasts. Something about a love affair and breasts. There were a few deaths and breasts and... ...yes, there was a thong despite the fact it takes place a long time ago before there were thongs and...yes, breasts. What you have here is really a movie about breasts, but, it is a period piece Lovecraftian movie about breasts. So if you want breasts, this is the movie for you, especially since it really makes no effort whatsoever to pass itself off as anything but a movie about breasts. Breasts. You really have to appreciate that honesty.”